Plum's Page

Keith Plummer, well-known for his unusual sense of humour (and his good looks ), presents the lighter side of Olney Rugby Club goings on...

South Africa 2007 Africa Survival Guide A Welsh Hooker

Well done Olney ! League Winners !

Our new lucky mascot Diana Burnett and fiance Guy Siner.

Diana first came to the club on the opening of the clubhouse in 1988 as her

father, Pat Sowman, was then the oldest surviving Club Captain. Stuart Parkin

is currently the oldest surviving captain.

Keano tackles from behind I blame the parents

Hacker struggles with Nazi Salute Raana tries a pickled egg

Quotes of the week - Charlie Tompkins - " We could have pancakes one night for breakfast "

Joe Dorrell - " The alarm's not working, it went off this morning"

Basher - " I only come down here for the atmosphere, not to get drunk like you lot."

Johnny Carr - On fundraising " I'll help out with new years eve, just let me know when it is"

Joe Dorrell - "The seconds won by a point, 19 to something"

Ed asks Parky " Did they take you to that village that isn't there anymore ? "

Ian Bennet on plane to South Africa - " We are all in the same boat guys"

Johnsie - " How far away are we from here ? "

Mark Lay has secured the services of Japanese hooker - Idge E Fan yee for next season.

Triggers Quotes - "Traffic is very heavy at the moment, so if you are leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier. "

" Look ! Someones shouting ! "

" Who's inlaws are you meeting , yours ? or your wives ?"

" The One Stop was shut due to the shortness of staff"

" He lives just up the road, he lives in Australia now"

" Plum can't have a bath with a carstor plast on "

" Leave the water running, or it will get sterile "

" Theres been an earthcake in Gwent "

" How much is a fiver worth in Scotland ?

" Its the best thing since sliced butter"

" Its the same price, but a little bit more expensive"

" I couldn't fight my way out of a wet steel bag "

** NEW ** Guess The Baby! Take a look at some of the club when were they young, see if you can guess who they are!

If there were no natural sponges in the sea, would we be flooded ?

I was in a pub and told the following joke:

What do you do if an epileptic has a fit in the bath?

Throw your clothes in so they get a wash.

Once the guffawing of my friends had died down, I became aware of a man on the other side of the bar, looking quite choked and talking to the landlord. The landlord came over to me and told me that the gentleman at the bar had recently lost his son and that my joke had offended him. I thought I should apologise. I approached the gentleman at the bar and offered my condolences for his loss and my apologies if my joke had upset him. He said that the joke had only got to him because his son was an epileptic and it was a fit which killed him.

I wondered as to how a fit could actually kill someone and the man said that his son had slipped and hit his head and that was what had killed him. I asked where his son had slipped and the man said it was in the bath. Well, I realised then how inappropriate my joke had been in the circumstances.

"Did your son hit his head on a tap then?" I asked.

"No," replied the man; "he choked on one of my socks".

GUESS WHO'S EAR ?

First correct answer gets a pint from Plum

Click here for more ears to chew on!!!

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder ...

I am in shape. Round is a shape.

View from the East Stand Find out what was really happening last week at the club! (Not for the prudish!)	Joke of the Week Updated !	Club Lookalikes Updated !	News of the World Well, well! Guess what our boys have been up to? For all those too posh to buy the News of the World, this is what you missed. Hey, Brendan, okay mate, hope you see this!!

Tug of War Oh dear, the kids did it again at the Church fete. Is that Tom on the floor.....	Ask Stanners! Any personal problems just drop Stanners a line and he'll try to answer them with his expert wisdom, experience & knowledge.	Sunday Meat Raffle The highlight of the week, who says it's a fiddle? Next week's meat raffle winners are...	Panto We couldn't forget the panto, oh yes we could, oh no we couldn't, oh yes we could!

Club Dinners Check out pictures from previous Club dinners, remember Will Greenwood, Gareth Chilcott, Willie John McBride, David Duckham, who forgets Jason Leonard, and of course Plod & Spider asleep!	A Blast from the Past Check out some vintage photos. Guess who!	NEW YEARS EVE 2006 !

I dont think I should be a member of a club that accepts people like me as a member

If anybody has any amusing or embarassing stories or pictures please drop Plum a line Keithplummer@aol.com and providing it's legal we will do our best to publish it for everyone to enjoy!!

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